Archive for the ‘jealousy’ Category

Second Thoughts

Monday, May 10th, 2010

Maybe I shouldn’t be taking pictures every day. Maybe I should be practising my writing instead. I need to get better than I am for me to be happy with my work, and sitting reading and doing other kinds of work might not be as good a way to get better at writing as writing would be.

Oh, but I do need a rest. I know what I want to write for the next one, but I don’t want to be sitting on my own and typing all the time just now.

I think I’m feeling a little worried because my friends are being very prolific all of a sudden. I’ve got word-count envy. Here’s a new magazine called Other by the novelist and blogger Socrates Adams. I think it’s going to be good. Bookmark it now.

Here’s an interview my friend Kim did with my other friend Tom about his new novel, The Leaping. It’s good too.

I’ve also been sorting through old interviews, short stories published on-line, guest blogs etc and deciding what I’m going to feature on my new website and what I’m going to let disappear. Reading through some of the stories linked to in the side-bar I am not so happy. I could do better now. I think I could have done better then if I’d have rested more and not been in such a rush to be a real writer.

The new website is going to be good. I’ve seen some ‘mock-ups’ so far and it looks very exciting. I will be blogging at the new website too, so soon people who read this blog will have to change their bookmarks or point their feed-readers somewhere else. Don’t worry. I will give ample and frequent warning.

I should be doing some magazines or new stories or the first draft of book three. I should be typing furiously. I feel racked with guilt.

More Lists

Monday, April 13th, 2009

You know what gets my goat? What REALLY gnarls my chizzle?

1. Groups, clubs, scenes, schools, societies, churches.
2. Matching lipstick and nail varnish.
3. The phrase, ‘I think you’ll find,’
4. BT, the DVLA, TV Licensing people, landlords, estate-agents.
5. People who laugh while walking away, and try to hide it by ducking their head, but me being able to tell because their shoulders are shaking.
6. People being late. If you’re going to be more than five minutes late, ring me. I won’t wait otherwise.
7. Winking. After nearly two years of working in a prison, being winked at has lost its appeal.
8. The man on the beach yesterday whose dog did a poo on the sand. He put it in a plastic bag (black) tied up the top and then slung it behind a sand-dune. WHAT? I had to be forcibly restrained from giving him the poo back, and quite forcefully.
9. Ulterior motives/tact. Nine times out of ten I am just not going to understand if you say, ‘oh, do you think those orange socks work well with that suit?’. Just spit it out. Out.
10. Blogging. Ugh what a bunch of narcissists. It is sickening. I keep meaning to give it up. Really.

Coffee chapbook by Time Travel Opportunists Review

Thursday, May 15th, 2008



Here is a small review, with pictures. It is for Coffee, a chapbook ‘out now’ written by the Time Travel Opportunists. Which I like.

First, the book comes as a real book. And I got one in the post. It was number 25, which is the same number as I am old. Which I really liked, although I don’t think they knew that when they posted it to me. I opened it in my PJs (white flannel with pink buttons and trim) and there were two extra things (other than the chapbook) in the envelope. One was a coffee bean covered in chocolate (vegan, so carob, I think it must be) inside a little brown envelope. And a little badge with a picture of an espresso jug on it. I ate the coffee bean right away. It was delicious and filled with caffeine nutrition. It stuck in my teeth a little bit, but not much. Which was the main thing.

The book itself. Top Banana! It is available for free to read here, and it comes with a CD with music and singing on. It is brown on the outside and made out of decent paper and sewn and it does not look like some people made it in their lunch hour on a photocopier. It looks ‘professional’ and something that is well worth exchanging some money for. When I held it in my hands but before I read it I thought, ‘this looks good’ and ‘I wish I could do something like this’ and ‘gets’.

The Time Travel Opportunists are Emma and Richard and Nathan. They do good writing. I liked ‘Eras’ (although the first time I read it I thought about how much I liked it and I wondered what I was missing that it was called ‘Ears’). I liked ‘Communion’. Although my favourite one was ‘Company’. It felt like it should be silly and make me laugh a bit because it is mainly about a tortoise, but actually it made me feel a bit sad. But in a good way.

There are some good lines. Here are two, although there are many more than two. All of the stories have good lines in them. But here are two of them:

‘It is a giant full stop that we slowly erase with our tongues.’ (Communion)

‘If Richard had any food in his digestive system before falling asleep he would never wake up.’ (Company)

The Time Travel Opportunists have another themed chapbook out soon. There will be a party. And good books. I hope I perfect motorway driving before then.

Crab Related Injuries

Sunday, August 26th, 2007

Today I was catching crabs in rock pools and putting them in a little pink bucket. They were tiny crabs, shells as transparent as wet fingernails. I attracted the interest of a little girl, six years old maybe, who warned me against trying to catch the big ones, because sometimes they bite.

‘I got bit by one once,’ she says, ‘right on my finger, and the pain, the blood up my arm, made the pain, go all the way up my arm, and I have a little red lump even now and sometimes the blood goes in there where the crab bit it and makes it sore. I have to go to the doctor’s every day.’

‘Every day?’ I say, doubtful and annoyed that she is scaring away my crabs.

‘Yes, and it is still really sore!’ she says, pulling down the front of her swimming costume and showing me her nipple. I avert my eyes, in case I am doing something that is an arrestable offence.

Totally unrelated, but my friend Chris Killen has just announced that his novel The Bird Room will be published. Not for a wee while yet, but it will be worth waiting for. When the crushing envy has evaporated, I’ll be congratulating him.


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