My Life Is Going To Be Like This

I am going to write lots of new things. Every day. I am going to write one thousand words a day. Some of it will be the wonderful, sparkling, daring new novel and some of it will be my off-beat, witty yet moving autobiographies. I am going to go out shopping and buy stylish clothes and new stationery. I will have a fountain pen the like of which has never been seen before. The words will flow out of this fountain pen like a big flowing thing. I am going to cut down on other people and sit in coffee shops in my stylish clothes and use my fountain pen. I will look interesting. I will have good hair without trying, and I will not know I have good hair. Someone will see me in the coffee shop and they will say, ‘my, how stylish you are, what are you writing?’ and I will show them the ineffable stationery and they will gasp and say, ‘my, your stylishness is only outweighed by your daring and witty yet moving prose. It is ordinary, full of details, and somehow beautiful. Let me buy you a hot air balloon.’ And I will say, ‘if you insist, you may.’

Then I will ride about in the hot-air balloon all day looking down on the people below and thinking about what a good writer I am. 

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